Kendall Jenner...why even bother putting pants on at all in America!?

Bret Michaels and his baby mama broke up...I can't wait for another season of Rock of Love...Greatest trashy reality dating show in America.

Annnd please bring back Rodeo...most favorite contestant in America.



Scariest Tom Hanks in America.

Kristen cheated on Rob...SLUTTIEST vampire in America.

(And I hate her.)

Colfax Avenue in Denver...longest continuous street in America.

Billy Chilies...literally and figuratively the hottest beer in America.

Shout out...Boo Meyers' most favorite beer in America.

Willow Smith wearing an I Free Slaves tee shirt...most absurd wannabe Abe Lincoln in America.

Saddest face in America.

1,000 slices of cheese...fattest Whopper in America.

Most correctly labeled shopping bag in America.